Sign in to follow this  
Rawf

Are you out to everyone?

Recommended Posts

No.. not that type of question :P

What I mean with that is, are you open to all your friends about your immigration status?

Personally, none of my friends know about my immigration status other than my long time best friend and another very good friend.. within the family, everyone knows.

We never talk about it and I know they are legal because they are under a working visa they renew every 3 years since they are all professionals already.. but they always think I'm a resident because of all the years I have been in the US. I know they wouldn't care, but I feel like the less people to know your status, the less worried you will be knowing they won't report you when you get into a bad argument.

Opinions?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate Rawf, only close friends of mine know which is about 4. Family of course knows, I also believe the fewer ppl know the less stress and worry we are. Some of those frnds of mine just found out, when they asked me if I knew any lawyers for immigration, everyone believes I am either a us citizen, or resident. ( I wish...!)

But I still haven't even send in my application... -_-

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Same here, only family knows and my both my ex boyfriends. Current boyfriend doesn't know but I promised Itzel that after I got approved, I would tell him. It sucks being the only one in my family who is not a citizen.

Honestly, I keep it from people because I never knowhow they are going to react if I tell them. I've been open about it in the past when dating someone new, and then they fall off the face of the earth cuz they think all I want is to get married so I can get my papers. Soooo not the case. Probably why I didn't tell my boyfriend now but I will if everything works out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Same here, only family knows and my both my ex boyfriends. Current boyfriend doesn't know but I promised Itzel that after I got approved, I would tell him. It sucks being the only one in my family who is not a citizen.

Honestly, I keep it from people because I never knowhow they are going to react if I tell them. I've been open about it in the past when dating someone new, and then they fall off the face of the earth cuz they think all I want is to get married so I can get my papers. Soooo not the case. Probably why I didn't tell my boyfriend now but I will if everything works out.

You don't have to tell anyone unless you are sure, it's something personal that you will eventually share with your loved one, but it will said when the time is right.

Only one of my ex's know about me and he is one of my good friends now.. he is also an immigrant who doesn't qualify for the DACA.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I havent told everyone about my "situation" unless Im asked straight out and then I explain the circumstances, if I feel like it. I and all of us DREAMERS did nothing wrong nor have nothing to hide. Ive always been pretty upfront about it.

If I'm considered a "sinner or evil" because of my legal status then who are they to throw the first stone?

Before looking at my conditions and problems, they should look at their own asses first.

I bow to no one but God.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ever since I've been here in the U.S I have acted as if I was from here. Obviously my family and long time friends know my status, but really, for me I have a big preference of keeping my status situation to myself. I can be opened about it given the right circumstances and or with certain people. I just haven't taken the time to think of a good reason for me to actually be opened about it...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just a few close family friends knows including my boss. Newe really discuss it with all of my friends :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You don't have to tell anyone unless you are sure, it's something personal that you will eventually share with your loved one, but it will said when the time is right.

Only one of my ex's know about me and he is one of my good friends now.. he is also an immigrant who doesn't qualify for the DACA.

I am sure I want to tell him. Trust me, telling people isn't something I take lightly. I just want to be able to show him that I am working on my situation when I tell him because I don't want hime thinking I need to marry him in order to get my papers. I want him to know and love me for the person I am and not think that I am with him just because there is a problem that needs to be fixed and its not his problem to fix.

We'll see. Time will only tell.

When friends ask why I don't drive, I just tell them driving scares me. It doesn't because I LOVE to drive, I just want to do it legally. And if someone ask why I don't work, I tell them I don't because I take care of my grandma who had a stroke this yr. And they understand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with all of you. Its something personal that only close friends & family know about. When things got serious with my husband (us citizen) i had to tell him because its something that affects him too. In reality its no ones business but it kind of does suck when i can't get into a club, bar or anything that requires a "valid id". I cant wait to get my situation fixed so i can show it off to the world lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

No one but my family, boyfriend and 2 friends. It took a lot to tell my 2 friends. Although I've maintained my Spanish and customs at home, I grew up here completely so everyone thinks I was either born here or a citizen.

I grew up in NH as the only Latina in my school so I was extremely ashamed, depressed and guilty about my situation. Obviously, I grew up and I now know better because I've been lucky enough to surround myself with amazing people but I still feel the sting of that shame I grew up with now and then.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

True! I hear arguments for both sides. A close family friend of mine bashed me because I did not tell my best friend in high school during our senior year. we had planned to attend the same college but I could not attend due to my situation. A few friends also confronted me about it in high school when we were applying for college and I denied it.

Personally, I think it should be up to the individual to share what they want. It's not like people go around sharing with every and anybody that they are insecure about x,y,z or that they were seriously hurt by someone in their lives, or that they were abandoned by their parents, for example. Not that immigration is like these issues but it could be. There are people who do not want to talk about their immigration issue because something terrible happened to them in their country.

Anyways, only 1 friend know the true depth of my problem and another friend kinda know. My boyfriend does not know tho I suspect he is suspish lol. He will know when we get to that level and my ex's don't know although one may have an idea lol.

My life is so mysterious

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Only my family and my best friend knows about my situation. I still remember when I was in high school most of my friends got their driver license and some friends asked me why don't I get a driver license... that was a very hard question to answer! But sometimes you just have to lie about it or what I told them was, "one day I will drive." It was hard very hard to tell my best friend my situation, because my parents always tell me not to tell anyone because the lesser people know the safer we can be. I ended up told my best friend but in writing which we share a note book in high school we will write down things we want to share with each other. I wasn't brave enough to tell her face to face. At the same time I'm afraid she might report me or have a different view about me. But it came down to she was very understanding and I'm glad that I told her my situation because sometimes I just need someone there to talk to. When we hang out with a group of friends some will asked me why I still not driving now. she would help me distract the person or say something else.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You guys I feel like we should compile our personal experiences on what is like to be a young immigrant brought to the US without a choice in a memoir. Some ignorant people think it is black or white when it comes to illegal immigration but we are evidence of the gray areas in this issue.

Living a lie is not easy especially when people ask simple questions or even when just filling out a simple medical form.

I feel like for those who choose to keep it as a secret -myself included- every single day there is something that reminds us of the uncertainty and mistery of the life as an illegal immigrant. I am so thankful for this opportunity. It has been such a long time since I felt real. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I'm going to come out to everyone once I get approved. My only reservation has been the wrong person knowing and using it against me for some reason. You never know, people are nuts. But once I get approved, I'd like to speak out and share my experience. It would not only be good for people to see a face of a Dreamer but for me as well, psychologically for my mental health lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this